Timmy’s Dream Analysis

So I had two really fucked up dreams last night.

The first was so creepy. I was at my parents house (which is where I am staying for the time being) and I was in my sisters room. No one was home and all the lights were off. I was standing there and I heard my girlfriend (ex-girlfriend? girlfriend in another state? whatever it is) calling my name. I wander into the house and it is pitch black. I see some sort of figure in the corner behind my moms recliner. I keep asking it it’s her and it says nothing. I decide to reach out and touch it and it bites me. It then jumps on top of me and it feels like some sort of humanoid, demonic, being with super sharp teeth. It keeps biting me and biting me and I am trying to wrestle it off of me. This is when I wake up.
So that was weird. I wonder does it have something to do with my current situation and how unhappy it has made me. Am I wrestling this “depression” and it is trying to kill me. Who knows.
I think the real analysis is that I shouldn’t have watched David Lynch’s Lost Highway right before I went to bed.
The second dream was just weird and I am not going to into detail on here about it (no it wasn’t what you are thinkin) it had something to do with a party, Charlotte’s web and Eskimo kisses.

Back in god old H-Town

So I am back in Houston. I suddenly feel like a whole new chapter of my life is starting. I am getting a new apartment. Starting up on some new opportunities in the fall and so many things have changed. So that suck some that are great.

The ones that suck are pretty shitty though. I had one of the worst days of my life yesterday. Leaving that Lagardia airport and trying so hard not to cry (and failing) was one of the most heartbreaking things that has ever happened to me. I have had some sad shit happen before but nothing affected me like yesterday. So now I am back in Houston. Trying not to think about it.
By the way the title of this blog was supposed to be Back in good old H-town. I decided to go with the typo.

By the way my longform Improv troupe will be performing in Austen at the Out of Bounds Improv Festival tomorrow so you should check it out if you are in town. 8pm at the Salvage Vanguard Theatre. $10. I promise I will be funny and not depressing like this blog post was.

NYC Trip

This trip has been quite interesting. I have enjoyed the festival and I need to make it out to see some more shows. I have to see NOIR: a Shot and a Chaser and also Exodus. I am going to try and make those most definitly before the festival ends.

Alright we have another show tonight. I am pretty excited.

Show Opens Tonight!

My show CHOOSE YOUR OWN PLAY will be having its New York City Premier tonight at 7pm. It will be showing at the CSV Cultural and Educational Center-Milagro which is at 107 Suffolk St. (in between Rivington and Delancey Streets).
The other performance dates are

Monday 8/11 @ 7pm (TONIGHT!)
Wednesday 8/13 @3:15 pm
Friday 8/15 @9:30 pm
Monday 8/18 @5:15 pm
Thursday 8/21 @9:30 pm

Come check out a show. It is a lot of fun and YOU decided what happens. So if you like audience participation, comedy, mythical sea creatures, magic spoons, live sex scenes, pogs, God, Satan, desert islands, or shows with over 80 different endings, than you might like this show.

www.chooseyourownplay.net

My Girlfriend and I fight on Facebook.

Chelsei Bertrand wrote at 5:30pm on May 31st, 2008 hello there timmy wood Wall-to-Wall – Write on Chelsei’s Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:27pm who is chelsei bIoTcH?!!!!!??? Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:28pm Nobody! I swear. She is just someone I met during one of the TImmy Wood SHow. Promise. Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:29pm YOU shit HEAD!!!! you are lying!!!! Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:30pm No. Baby. I love you baby. You know I would never do a thing like that baby. Baby. Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:34pm BAby My fAT ASS!!!! Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:36pm LOOK SHUTUP BEFORE I HIT YOU AGAIN! Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:38pm DONT YOU FUCKN TOUCH ME!!!!! Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:40pm I WILL TOUCH YOU SO HARD! AND BY TOUCH I MEAN SLAP YOU WITH MY FIST BITCH….try tell me who and who can’t comment on my facebook wall. YOU DON”T OWN ME! Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:43pm I OWN YOUR ASS MOTHER FUCKER!!!!! I SWEAR IF I SEE SOME OTHER LITTLE SLUT COMMENT ON YOUR PAGE I WILL FUCK UP HER WALL SO BAD…. SHE WILL END UP CLOSING HER ACCOUNT!!!! DONT YOU TEST ME!!!! Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:44pm now baby just calm down…. Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:45pm FFFFFFUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKK YYYYOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:46pm baby calm the FUCK down! Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:49pm you see this… huh? you see this? Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:51pm Baby. Put that gun down. Put that down baby. Don’t do sometin’ stupid baby Write on My Wall – Delete

Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:53pm stupid? lIkE THIIISSSS??????? *sixteen gunshots are fired* Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

Timmy Wood wrote at 10:54pm ……………………..……………………..……………. Write on My Wall – Delete Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:56pm bAby???? Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete Julie Gomez (Houston, TX) wrote at 10:57pm ……………………..……………………..……………………..…………………. Write on Julie’s Wall – Delete

uggg.. old angsty post from the past

On a whim I went back and read some posts from the Live Journal I used to keep as a blog my freshman and sophomore years of college and man were they embarrasing.
Every other post was me complaining about why girls don’t like me and the other was me raving about the latest movie I had seen and how much it rocked. I look at those and I am like, man did I really like Matrix Revolutions that much? Because I don’t like it at all now.
All my opinions have changed, for the better too. If I had known myself back then I would have thought that I was an idiot who didn’t know what he was talking about more than half the time.
No wonder girls didn’t like me then.

You Don’t Mess With the Zohan…No really…don’t

It was a hot day. A really hot day. I had the afternoon off and Julie and I discussed how to spend it. It being so hot I suggested that we nix anything that has to be outside. It was then suggested that we go to the theatre and see a movie. An air conditioned summer film would be perfect for a day like this. Of course there was nothing really of interest and I was in the mood for something stupid and simple, as was she, so I suggest the new Adam Sandler comedy You Don’t Mess With the Zohan.
I haven’t seen an Adam Sandler comedy in the theatre since Anger Management. That was the first time I realized a comedian that I once admired as a youth had lost what I found so amusing in the first place. It was that silly, “I don’t care how dumb this I thing it’s funny”, attitude that I loved as a high school kid in movies like Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore and the Wedding Singer. I even enjoyed the Waterboy. Something happened somewhere and his movies become more concerned with how many celebrity cameos he could fit in or let’s make this dumb movie have a message of some sort at the end.
When I saw the trailer for this movie I thought it looked dumb, really dumb , and that is what appealed to me. I thought awesome. A stupid adam sandler movie, that’s all I want. I also noticed it was co-written by Robert Smigel and Judd Apatow and I love both of their work. I was hoping that this was going to be a dumb stupid movie that had some fun laughs in it.
It wasn’t.
What we get here is something that is also a problem with I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, which I caught on cable some time ago. It’s like he wants to make a dumb movie but then realizes how dumb, and pretty offensive, it is. Then a tacky message like “Can’t we all just get along?” is tacked on which ends up just offending everyone in  the long run. Just make a dumb movie. It’s ok.
There are a few random laughs in the films and they belong to the ridiculous things, like the Zohan banging old ladies is funny too watch, Nick Swardson’s character is funny too. Everything else falls flat. The celebrity cameos, the jokes, the whole “message” of the film doesn’t work and it is slightly embarrasing. Adam take a look at what worked in the past. Do something dumb and don’t have any shame in it. I guaratee you at least the junior high audience will re-embrace you once again.

The Strangers

I saw the film The Strangers the other night and felt compelled to give a review for it.  I am going to discuss the movie in detail so don’t continue reading if you don’t want it spoiled for you. However if you don’t plan on seeing the movie or don’t care than continue reading, I would suggest the former.

The Strangers starts off pretty good. I am not talking about the very beginning with the proposal and stuff. I am talking about when the scary stuff happens because according to plot none of that stuff really mattered anyway. So we get this couple who are away in the house far away and what was supposed to be a night of romantic proposing turns into a night a rejection. Whatever so they, Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman, are all awkwardly hanging out at this house in the middle of nowhere.
There is a knock at the door. Creepy girl askes if some one is there they say she isn’t and she go the wrong house. Creepy girl comes bac, she is joined by two mask wearing psychopaths who hunt and torment said couple until at the end SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER They kill themEND SPOILER!
Wow, that sounds like quite the simple but yet suspenseful movie Timmy Wood.
And it almost was.
You see when things start to get creepy the movie really is really creepy. It starts with the girl and then there is the shot, which is in the trailer, where Liv Tyler is smoking and the guy just slowly walks behind her. In the film her does that and just stands there and it is scary as hell. My audience was freaking the fuck out over it. I don’t know how long that scene was but it seemed so long the way the audience kept screaming. I thought to myself “Man if he keeps this up this could be a good scary movie”
By he I mean Bryan Bertino the writer and director of the picture.
“How awesome” I thought “To have someone who wants to creat a mood and tone to make a movie scary as opposed to a series of jump scares.”
Unfortunately that is exactly what happened afterwards. The movie just turns into one cheap jump scare after another. No more of the creepy tone or mood just quick editing shots with loud music all designed to make you jump.
So then I am thinking “Ok. This is not going to be that type of movie. Let’s just see where this story goes maybe it will still redeem itself when we figure out who are these Strangers.”
But the story goes nowhere.  We never find out why these Strangers target this couple. We never know who they are or even what they look like. All they say is they are doing it because “You were home.” That’s what makes it so scary Timmy Wood. It was just a random act of violence it could happen to anybody. You are right that is scary. That is scary if you see it in a newspaper clipping or on the news or heard about from someone you knew. It is not scary for a movie though. Why not? Because the audience wants a pay off or an ending. We want to know why the hell are these things happening. That is what makes it a great story.
Then there is the ending ending which is the cheapest part of the movie. Two Mormon boys( I assumed they were mormon, they could have been Jehovah’s witness, christian, whatever) find the house and see the carnage and dead bodies of the night before. As one reaches over Liv Tyler to cop a feel, I think I have no idea what else he would be reaching for, she opens her eyes and screams. This scene was only put there to have one more jump right before the credits. So cheap. So cheap!
Grrr. I am more upset because this film looked like it had a glimmer of potential and then it all went down hill.
I would skip out on it, go watch the original Funny Games instead.

Season Four Finale of Lost. Tonight!

I am super excited about the season finale of Lost tonight. I think I am the only one of my friends still watching it. Every time I bring it up to my friends they all say the same thing.
“Yeah, I still haven’t caught up from the middle of the thirds season.”
Now I know that the third season wasn’t the greatest but does anyone still watch this show. When it started it was like I swear thirty or more people I knew were watching it. Now it is myself and another guy I work with. Even my girlfriend usually just falls asleep during the episode and as opposed to rewatching it makes me explain, and by explain she means act out bit by bit, the whole episode. She usualley at the end says something to the effect of “How many more seasons are there? Two! I wish someone would just tell me how it ends already.”
I think this is how a lot of people feel. Doesn’t anybody enjoy the thrill of the chase or the mystery. Everyone seems to want instant gratification. I know people that would rather watch a bootleg of a film six months before it comes out even though half of the work isn’t even finished yet. Is that even a movie?
I for one enjoy the wait and will always wait until opening night or whatever to see what I am waiting for.
And yes I am super excited about tonight!

Comic Survey

Saw a few people fill this out. I am waiting on people to show up at my house so I thought I would kill time with it.

1. What was the first comic you remember reading?

Alright my first comic was not this comic necessarily but it was an Archie comic and I have hunted everywhere for it. I can’t seem to find information on it online either. It was Archie, Betty and Veronica and they were hiking through the forest. I think their car had broken down or something.  Anyway as they parade through the forest they find these circles in the ground that are in the shape of giant circles. They debate about what these could mean and follow them which leads them to not a bigfoot monster but a bigBUTT monster. I shit you not. Now I don’t believe they refered to it as a Bigbutt but that is what it was. It was big foot, but instead of having big feet it had a big bottom and every couple of steps he would fall down on his bottom. Archie, being the engineering genius he is, realizes that old Big Butt is off balance and somehow hangs weights from his nose. I don’t remember how he accomplishes this but it is what happens. This leads the bigfoot happy and impresses the two girls enough that they agree to that threesome. Ha. In your dreams Arch.
I have no clue what number comic it is or whether it was Archie, or Archie and Friends or one of the other ones. If anyone out there knows what I am talking about shoot me a line and let me know.

2. What was the first comic that made you realize that you might be in this for the long haul?

I hadn’t read comics in a long time and when I had read them they weren’t really mine. My parents were pretty strict and wouldn’t allow me to “waste my money” on such things. At one point I kind of forgot about comics until I was a senior in high school and I decided to check out the local comic shop. While I was there I picked up Y: the Last Man and I was hooked ever since.

3. If you had to make a snap decision to take one comic or one comic run to a desert island, what would it be? Don’t think too hard!

I really don’t know what to put here. So many titles that I love. I am just going to look at my shelf and pick… ALan Moore’s run on Swamp Thing. There I can live with that.

Oh, there are my quests. Later Folks.