Tea Aye Are Ee Dee

I am tired. This job hunt is killing me.
I  have been what I call “resume bombing” restaurants and bars all over NYC. Everywhere I go I get the same response “Well this is a good time because the holidays will be here soon.” If it is such a good time how come none of y’all have called me back! I checked my number on the resume to make sure it was the right one.
I have become incredibly aggressive about it too. I got word through the grape vine that a restaurant in the Hells Kitchen area was looking for employees. I also found out that the manager/owner would be there around 5:30. I staked the place out. I had already dropped my resume off there a couple of weeks earlier so I knew where it was. They only seem to hire pretty gay boys, I’m pretty boy and can fey it up if I have too. So I went in and talked to the hostess.

Me: Hi, I looking for S—-
Hostess: oh he won’t be here for another fifteen minutes, you can..
Me: It’s ok. I’ll wait.
and I did, until he arrived.
Hostess: He’s out there, reviewing the specials for the evening with the chef and the waiters.
Me: Thanks.
I walked out, he saw me and motioned to wait a moment. He and his partner sat at a table while he tasted the specials and the waiters made some jokes. Eventually they went away and I sat down.
S: Ok Tim have a seat.
Me: Hi, I hear you are looking to hire a host/waiter. I dropped off my resume a couple of weeks ago. M—- and S—- referred me to you.
S: Oh the same, M—- who disappeared off the face of the earth and the S—- who got another job.
Me: The same.
S: let me see the resume.

He went over it. Asked me questions about my work history and why I came to New York.

Me: I am a comedian.

S: Well then make me laugh
I hate when people respond this way, my stock response is usually
Me: Give me a reason to and I will.
He laughed.

We talked a little more about what I would bring to the restaurant.  I also told him I could start immediatley. He said he would think about it and call me (which I don’t think is going to happen)
I think he liked me and seemed to appreciate my tenacity but even I could see how I might not be the best fit for his restaurant. *Sigh* back to the drawing board.
I have another interview tonight, don’t want to jinx it by talking about so that will wait until a later blog.

I do have to thank my friend The Grad Student who has been keeping me afloat during this job search. She has been like that girl who helps out Keifer Sutherland on 24. She calls me with
“This catering company is having a cattle call on 44th st.”
“I’ll be right there!”
She also has a nose for finding out about free food and events going on about town or on NYU’s campus. One of which was a “Grad Student Welcoming Event”

Me: But I am not a grad student!
Grad Student: Who cares? And they aren’t going to know the difference. Aren’t you an improviser anyway?

She had a point so I followed her to the library where the event was being held. We stood in line to get in. There was a lady handing out raffle tickets.
“Now, everyone write your name and your grad program on the name tag.”

I was not going to commit to any grad program as they only one I could think of was a program called Drama Therapy. I had just met a girl who was studying that.
“We just put on tiaras and tutus and cry about our feelings.” Is what she explained to me whenever I had asked her about it. I figured if I became pressed for it I could use the same line.
As I wrote my name on the tag though I thought, why commit to any program. I will just answer the first thing that pops in my head. Hopefully by that time I will have downed enough free sandwiches and wine to satisfy myself.  Or if worse comes to worse I could just play the shy bashful student.
I entered the room and headed straight for the snack table.

By the way there was enough food there to feed a small country. NYU students want to know where your tuition money goes, well this is it. As I stuffed my face and just answered questions from fellow meet and greeters with whatever popped into my head first.

The Question:
So what grad program are you involved in?

The Answers:
Social work. I really love helping people, plus social networks are fun to.

I am studying creative writing with an emphasis on blogging.

Undeclared.

I am in a new program. You’ve probably never heard of it. It hasn’t even been named yet.

What program are you in? yeah I am in that one too. How come I haven’t seen you around?

NONE OF YOUR GODDAMN BUSINESS!

etc, etc, etc.

The Grad Student has also snuck me into: Lectures on arts fundraising, The Sexuality and Gender Studies Centers new website launch and A Nutritional Eating Lecture. All of these offered free food and wine to NYU students, which I pretended to be.

That’s all for now. Off to the interview. Send your good vibes my way.